In a shock development earlier today, Canada defected to the West!
Stephen Harper’s Conservatives look set to form a minority government, based on a platform of fiscal restraint, support for the war on terror, beefing up Canada’s military, repairing relations with Washington, and jamming Belinda Stronach’s head on a sharp stick.
Prime Minister Paul Martin has announced he will be stepping down from the Liberal leadership to pursue a new career as a beloved Canadian singer-songwriter.
“At 7PM the main hatchway caved in, he said fellas it’s been good to know ya.”
Several nations have already indicated they intend to appeal to the UN Security Council to prevent this, arguing that Canada has still not obeyed previous directives to turn Gordon Lightfoot over to the International War Crimes Tribunal the the Hauge for his part in “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald”.
We may allow ourselves a brief period of rejoicing; but let us not forget for a moment the toil and efforts that lie ahead. Helen Clark, with all her treachery and greed, remains unsubdued. The injury she has inflicted on Great Britain, the United States, and other countries, and her detestable cruelties, call for justice and retribution. We must now devote all our strength and resources to the completion of our task, both at home and abroad. Advance, Britannia! Long live the cause of freedom! God save the King!
January 23rd, 2006 at 4:07 pm
We shall see what they can do with a minority. Most likely, not much. Also, there is allways the possibility of an anti-conservative coalition.
January 23rd, 2006 at 4:14 pm
And monkeys might fly out of my ass. The liberals are political lepers.
January 23rd, 2006 at 6:00 pm
You guys have really got to see this. Total, utter denial of reality. Hilarious!
http://canadared.blogspot.com/2006/01/canada-will-remain-canada.html
January 23rd, 2006 at 7:55 pm
Well the Liberals and PQ could get together. But that seems unlikely. What would be rather good fun is if the PQ & Tories got together in coalition.
January 23rd, 2006 at 8:18 pm
“The liberals are political lepers. ”
True. However, the Left parties are comimited to keeping their social programs and socialized health care to the point of fanaticism. It is possible they could put their differences aside and form a coalition.
Not likely, mabye, but possible.
Time will tell.
January 24th, 2006 at 2:59 am
I am so fucking pissed at that whore Belinda Stronach for her out right lies .I am sending a message to Rona Ambrose discredit this Paris Hilton of the north.God I’m sick!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
January 24th, 2006 at 6:04 am
Given that Harper has a minority govt and will have to rely on the Bloc Quebec for a majority in the Commons, I think the Churchill quote you should paraphase is the one about the Battle of El Alamein,ie.
“This is not the End, nor the beginning of the End,
but perhaps it is, the End of the Beginning!”
January 24th, 2006 at 6:07 am
Just realized you had put the Conservative symbol, in place of the Soviet Hammer & Sickle on the Red Army Flag. Cool, Man, Cool! Really Far Out!
January 24th, 2006 at 8:42 am
I am reminded of the Churchill quote where he says Britain could afford to ignore the threat of Hitler if it could be dragged 3,000 miles West across the Atlantic.
A pity the Brits and Quebecoire can’t swap land masses - then you’d have the Frogs together and the Westerners who descend from John Locke together.
January 25th, 2006 at 1:06 pm
…And just what the hell’s wrong with Gordon Lightfoot? Or “The Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald?” If you really want to report a Canadian atrocity to the Hague, here’s two words for you: Celine Dion Remember that hysterical breakdown she had before the international media during the reports of rioting in New Orleans following Hurricane Katrina? “Waaah! Leave them alone! Just for once let them touch the nice things…!”
And two more: Avril Lavigne. If I hear “Complicated” or that frickin’ “Sk8r Boi” song just one more time, my head will frickin’ EXPLODE.
Although the image of Paul Martin crooning “Fellas, it’s been good to know ya…” is just priceless…
January 25th, 2006 at 5:49 pm
Celine Dion’s singing is a nervous breakdown all in itself.
January 28th, 2006 at 12:42 pm
Celine who? Ohhhh…. the “pur laine” one. Reminds me of a braying ass.